A Problem Shared: Swearing Parent at the School Gate

A Problem Shared Parenting & Family Advice | by | 1st Sep 2017

Swearing Parent APS Cover

She’s fed up with another mum swearing at the school gate. The potty-mouthed mother has been told to stop but refuses to do so. Do you have any advice to share in this week’s A Problem Shared?

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Hi FamilyPoint,

How do I deal with other people swearing around my children? School will be starting back again soon and I’ve started to worry again about a particular parent who has a real potty mouth. She is fully aware that she does it and doesn’t care at all. She just says that’s how she talks and people have to deal with it. I’ve heard her say things like, “I know people don’t like me because I swear but that’s how I speak, so tough!”

I don’t swear around my children at all and can’t stand hearing young children swearing. So it’s really upsetting that this parent does this outside the school gates where I can’t protect my children from it. A few other parents roll their eyes and just seem to accept that it’s just the way she is.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like I can tell her as she has made it quite clear that she doesn’t care. Am I being too prudish trying to shelter my children away from that kind of language?

finger on lips for swearing parent a problem shared -Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

Our FamilyPoint advice for dealing with swearing

Thanks for contacting us here at Familypoint Cymru. Sorry to hear about the difficult situation you’re experiencing with the other parent that swears publicly. It’s always hard when we see or hear behavior in front of our children that we don’t want them to experience. It’s our natural instinct to want to protect our children and make sure they don’t experience anything that might influence their own behavior.

If you’re a parent that doesn’t swear, then the likelihood is that your children are very much aware that this behavior is not allowed or approved by yourself. Even though children do pick up on the way that others behave, you as a parent are their main influence for their own behavior.

You could use the parent that swears as an example. Make sure that your children are aware that you don’t approve of swearing. Next explain that everyone is different but that you don’t want them to listen or copy what this particular parent says. This could be a way of turning a negative situation into a positive. Use this example as a conversation topic for you and your children. You could have a chat to them about what other strategies you and others use when they want to express strong emotions other than swearing. This will be a useful tool for them for the future.

I hope this helps you and thanks for contacting us here at Familypoint Cymru.

FamilyPoint Helpline

If you would like further information on national or local support services, then you can contact us at FamilyPoint Cymru via phone 0300 222 57 57, text 07860 052 905, or IM/Chat. We are open Monday to Friday 9am-5pm.

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